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Sunday, June 11, 2006

Worldcup rules

I got an email about the house hold rules from Germany and since this weekend was pretty dull and there was really nothing blog worthy - I thought this would be fun and translated it for you.

Household rules for women during the Worldcup 2006 from June 9th to July 9th.
§ 1 During the period from 6/9 to 7/9 the man is the absolute ruler of the TV and its remote control

§ 2 The wife is to occupy herself quietly with house work.

§ 3 Prior to every game the man is to be served an cold case of alcoholic beer. This is to be placed next to the TV chair and it is strongly emphasized that the beer is cold

§ 4 During the game the wife is under no circumstances allowed in the TV room. She is allowed to restock beer and snacks as needed.

§ 5 During half time the woman is granted a 15 min right to enter the room in order to empty the ash tray and replace empty bottles with newly cool full once. If necessary new snacks are to be provided. It is not allowed to make any noise (chip bags are to be handled quietly) Every type of verbal communication is not allowed.

§ 6 At least 30 minutes prior to a game the husband is to be served a meal made with love. In order not to interrupt the mental readiness of the man, talking is not allowed.

§ 7 During the worldcup any actions that could result in reproduction are not allowed. It is also forbidden to wear clothes that could cause an urge in the man to do such actions. However wearing such cloths and engaging in such actions are allowed after the game is over and as long as the games outcome was to the mans satisfaction.

§ 8 If the mans generosity allows the woman to take one or two looks on the screen at the came, questions that would reveal the womens soccer intellect are forbidden. The same goes for verbal outbreaks. There can also not be mentioning about the looks of players (i.e. Beckham looks really hot today!).

So dear women if you can keep within these small rules, your man will thank you with trying to

a) not spill any beer

b) ensuring not to put to many crumbs within the 3 meters around the trainings chair (TV chair),

c) while eating the meal mentioned in § 6 he will not constantly reminisce his mothers culinary talents

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As you can see the Germans take their soccer very serious. Jin how are the english rules - has David explained them to you yet?

13 comments:

Michele said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Michele said...

Katy let's have our own t.v. and
watch a good movie and have a
great time.Too many rules right
there.I say you watch what you
wanna watch and i'll watch what
i wanna watch in another room.
Of course with snacks!

Dino said...

I agree. There were actually several hotels that are offering get a ways and there is one where they will give the guest something free (forgot what it was) if their staff utters words related into the worldcup.

jin said...

LMAO katy!!!
ok...here goes...
1. D & I watch together, I enjoy it too, unless it's the 8AM game...seeing as how I go to bed about 5AM it's near impossible for me to get up at that time, especially this week (Way too busy!). Next week I might when the games start getting better.
2. OMG is Beckham HOT!!!!! :-P
3. David explains things to me if I ask...but he's pretty cool that way! lol
4. I LOVE looking at all those guys big muscular thighs. *HUGE GRIN*
5. D doesn't drink at all so we don't have to worry about the 'cold beer' thing!
6. If I have to come to work during the games D will watch world cup & my puppy. That makes us both happy!

Although, I will admit, the last 2 weeks D has been FREAKING OUT worried that for whatever reason we wouldn't get the world cup on our TV. He kept saying..."I've NEVER missed the world cup. NEVER EVER! I hate the states...you only have shyte on your TV!!!"
LMAO!!!
We get ALL the games though, so all is good here. :-)

Dino said...

Jin - it is bred into the DNA of German, English, Italian and Brazilian man. Some may not be as fanatic thoughout the season but once it is time for the championship they are all the same :).

Unknown said...

So this world cup thing is some kind of race, right? Like NASCAR?

Because if it was like the biggest soccer match in the world I don't think I would be interested.

Dino said...

Real - well its sort of a race they all race after a ball and there are obstacls (aka opposite team, aka moral enemy!) They just use their legs instead of some car where all they do is sit and go around, around, around, around ... (*I am dizzy now!)

jin said...

Will send you the pound cake recipe tonight katy...it's not incredibly detailed...but if you know cake basics it'll turn out great!

p.s. It is so incredibly fattening you won't believe it when you read it! LOL
But that's what makes it sooo good! lol

Dino said...

thanks Jin I can't wait. I am getting ready to make an apple cake for Grumpy tonight

Unknown said...

roflmao. yeah, that pretty much sums it up. ;) funny post. thanks.

Dino said...

JD - you are welcome. The best part is most of these are so true for German men.

Unknown said...

LOL Katy, they're true for most European men and could also be translated for American men for the Super Bowl, World Series, etc. very very funny.

Dino said...

JD I agree men are the same everywhere just the sport changes