To do or not to do

I am so confused. Yesterday morning I was totally excited. Grumpy and I had another appointment at the Jones institute and we got the prescriptions for the next step in fertility treatment and there is a chance that if it works I could be pregnant within the month. Later that night I talked to my mom and she freaked since I have 2 fights coming up one to Germany in August which c(w)ould be my first trimester. My mom is all worried since she believes that I would be a high risk pregnancy and that means I shouldn't fly. Grumpy agrees with this and says too I shouldn't fly if I do end up pregnant. Which means I'd have to cancel both of my upcoming trips - the wedding in Chicago and my trip to Germany for my best friends wedding to which I have been looking forward too for a year now. I was there when they met in 92 and now they finally tie the knot and I may not be there. The option my mom suggested is to wait with proceeding with the next step until after I get back. Grumpy doesn't like the idea since we don't even know if this step will work. Its just taking hormones and there is a good chance it wont work. He feels we should proceed and see if it works if it does then I'd have to cancel the trip.

I just don't know. I know flying is safe in the beginning if its a normal pregnancy and I guess we could go ahead and see what happens and if I do end up pregnant it may be a normal one and I can go after all. Of course even in normal pregnancies things can go wrong and I know I'd blame myself and always wonder if the trips could have been the reason. Which leads me back to probably not doing the trip if I were to be pregnant and that makes me sad. I mean would waiting 3 months be so bad? I have waited for years another 3 months shouldn't be bad. Also since I am still good about going to the gym - 3 more months would hopefully mean more weight loss and a safer pregnancy. The other thing is the finances we are slowly digging ourselves out of dept with my new job and Grumpy's promotion we can finally pay more than just minimum payments. Waiting would give us at least 3 more months of having extra money to pay into credit cards. It would also mean the child would come after my 1yr anniversary with my new job where I get another substantial raise and my job would be more secure since I'd have the experience needed to get a job about anywhere in the industry. But then don't they say if you wait for the perfect time then you'll never have kids because there will always be something????

I know Grumpy wants to move forward but he says its my decision and I just don't know what to do. Any suggestions? I think I am leaning toward waiting but I know it will upset Grumpy I mean he'll leave it up to me but I know he wants to move forward after all he is not getting any younger with the big 40 looming over his head this year.

hi

hi
Originally uploaded by dino0477.

Well i am out and about again. I was on site in Richmond all day and just got into Charlottesville. I ended up changing my room as only the top floor of this NEW Hilton has cell reception. Kinda stupid now i need to make sure i am always on the top floor. But I do have a nice view from up here.


ADDENDUM 2330

I had a rather interesting evening. I had told one of the nurses on my study I'd meet her for a drink - she was getting bugged by lots of people this week and I was trying to cheer her up. Well she called me late in the afternoon and said she and some friends were going to the Dogwood festival and didn't I want to go along. I tried to talk my way out of it but unsuccessful. Fast forward 2 hours here are some pics - I did have a bite of yummy funnel cake

the night ended with me hanging upside down in the skymaster with the seat being loose and fearing for my life. I was never afraid of rides but the harnes never clicked in and all that was holding me was the itty bitty seatbelt. granted there was a metal cage around the whole thing but still not very comforting.

This car was in the parking lot of the hotel when I got back - not sure if it is a real "pace car" but it looked cool.

Look who is back

Look who is back
Originally uploaded by dino0477.

Wrap up

Here is another airport post. I managed to get on an earlier flight to Charlotte and am waiting for it now. I still can get home earlier but at least this way I have more than 30min to catch my connecting flight. Who knows I maybe even get to stop by Jamba Juice.

The meeting was okay - Cleveland isn't really a nice city and the hotel despite being a Ritz had seen better days. They did have a nice gym. I had crashed Tuesday at 7pm didn't wake up until the next morning so I never got to go but I did go last night (midnightish) and then this afternoon as our meeting ended at noon and the shuttle wasn't coming till 3pm. This afternoon one of the other monitors was in there and wow - my 45min on the cross trainer never passed that fast before. He is a cutie former navy guy and we chatted while working out and I was done in no time at all and had done 4.7 miles. I was pretty proud of myself ;)

So here are the rest of my pictures:

The outside of the Hall of Fame
no explanation needed the sign says it all Here is what I bought at the gift shop
I went a head and sent Grumpy the pic and he approves of the purchase - wonder if I took it at the right angle ;)


Here are some of my team mates including our manager (second from the left) - after the Hall of Fame we met in the Lobby for a "team building exercise" each state had to come up with fun facts about there area. - We based ours on Virginia is for Lovers and had lots of fun preparing it over some wine our manager treated us too. The presentation was a hit this morning. The one that got the most laughs was the VA Law about it being illegal to own a skunk as a pet.

So we are about to start boarding which me luck I can't wait to get home and see my babies.

cleveland

cleveland
Originally uploaded by dino0477.

Hi from the rock and roll hall of fame

too early

I finally went to bed about 1am - my alarm went off at 3am. I am so not a morning person!!!

So now I am sitting at the (almost) empty airport. I got lucky with the security check in. The guy infront of me took forever to get his stuff together - take off shoes, take out computer and liquids ... - so I skipped in front of him. Well the TSA people were doing the lets check every 6th person thing he was number 6. Had I stayed in line it would have been me. HIHI I mean I had enough time so it wouldn't have been a big deal I just don't like them taking my bags apart. Besides I would not have been able to post.

Quick update on the past weekend. I finally made it home sometime after 11pm. My friend from NY state had come down for the weekend and picked me up. We were going to have dinner but the delay canceled that plan. So we just went to the house chatted a bit and crashed sometime around 2am. Saturday we went out to get the ingredients for Maultaschen as she grew up in Germany and its one of her favorite things to eat. They turned out okay and she happily munched on them along with some wine she had brought for us to try. Sunday was here before we knew it. We had lunch at the German Restaurant were some of my au pairs, former au pairs and friends joined us. The food was good as always. After my friend left to head back up to NY I went home for a well deserved nap. After traveling the whole week and having a busy weekend I was pooped. Grumpy and I were going to go to the gym but I just couldn't get moving.

Yesterday was my office day I did get some stuff done. After finishing up in my office I headed over to the my old job and office to get some of the stuff done there. I was pretty productive and got through a lot before meeting Grumpy at the gym. After that I stopped at the Italian restaurant to show the owner some stuff on his web site. Of course the discussion eventually got back to this whole mess ... You know I am over it and I am tried of explaining myself. There a lines you shouldn't cross and once you do there is no coming back. To me the most important part is how people act after they screw up as I believe that shows their character.

Well they just called my flight so let me get packed up. I am sure I'll post from Cleveland - after all we are going to the Rock and Roll hall of fame there's got to be at least one post in that one!

Anyone know a copilot

I WANNA GO HOME!!!!!!!!! NOW!!!!!

I guess it would have been to much to ask for me to actually get home in time for my dinner plans. I am still in Atlanta - as is the plane, the flight assistants and the passengers - what is missing is the damn co pilot.

I should have know better than to make dinner plans. My friend Tara is at the house - she was going to pick me up from the airport (@ 8pm) and we were going to have a nice dinner at Al Fresco.
Sadly the copilot being delayed for 2h is causing those plans to be canceled. I was so looking forward to a nice dinner. I mean we'll do it tomorrow but I wanted it today. I am hoping we'll get in a bit before 10pm so maybe I can call the restaurant and they'll get some food for us before the kitchen closes. We'll see but I am not putting my hopes up. To make matters worse I am starving ...